After playing enough of MKWii, I suppose it’s finally high time I got around to writing about it. First things first… I’m giving this game an 8.5 out of 10. That isn’t to say that I don’t completely love the game, because I do, but it has enough moments where you ask yourself just why Nintendo decided to do things the way they did that can really take you out of the game.

Let’s talk about the good. To many vets of the DS version of Mario Kart, Mario Kart Wii is almost going to feel like “more of the same”. Fortunately for those of us who liked MKDS, this isn’t a bad thing at all. Nintendo didn’t change the formula too dramatically, with the biggest changes coming in the form of motorcycles you can race in (to complement the karts) and the new steering wheel adapter that really does a great job of motion-controlled steering. Bikes are a bit tough to adjust to at first, but if you play the Grand Prix circuits the 100cc circuit is exclusively bikes in an effort to force the player to at least get a taste of them. Bikes can only charge a single level of sparks in drifts, which means they can’t get the same level of Mini-Turbo (MT) coming off a turn as a kart can after charging to the second level, but bikes gain a distinct advantage in the straightaways with the ability to pop wheelies for a small boost in speed. They also handle much tighter than any kart, which is great for tracks with tight corners but can very often leave you stuck in the grass on the inside corner of a turn (or facing the inside corner of a wall) for the inexperienced racer. Still, they’re a nice change to the series and I wouldn’t be surprised to see them stick around for the next installment of the series as well. Fingers crossed Nintendo just stays away from airplanes a-la Diddy Kong Racing.

For the most part, “the good” simply contains Nintendo continuing to do well what they have done well in the past with the series. A healthy number of tracks - 16 brand new and 16 “retro” revamped tracks, similar to what they did in MKDS - with GP’s across 4 race classes: 50cc, 100cc, 150cc, and 150cc mirror where all the tracks are flipped left-to-right. On top of the GP’s, there are Time Trials where you simply race the clock with three boost mushrooms to last the full three laps. Similarly to MKDS, there are Staff Ghosts that come with the game so you can race against a saved ghost to try and better your time with a goal in mind. A new addition in this game are EXPERT Staff Ghost times, which will unlock on a track after you beat a certain time better than the original staff ghosts; these guys are tough, and I doubt most players of the game will ever beat most of these ghosts without serious dedication put into the game.

Online has been slightly re-tooled, mostly for the better. Pick-up-and-play has seen a vast improvement in MKWii over MKDS, with online matches supporting up to 12 players at the same time (and one console can bring 2 players online to play split-screen, also). When you attempt to find a game, you will more often than not be dropped into spectator mode of a session already happening online, where you will have to wait for the current race to be over before going back to the Track Voting screen. Personally I prefer this method over the servers attempting to find players who happen to be looking for a match at the same time all into the same game, especially when you do have the 12-racer limit. You may have a race with 5 people, and the next race will have a full 12 players on the track, which is really nice and also doesn’t limit you to a 4-race, Grand- Prix-style format either, since you can stay in one session and keep racing for as long as you want.

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Today I had a few people over and one of my buddies (Org, for people who know him) showed up with a trophy in his hands. When I asked what on Earth he had in his hands, it turned out that he went out to the GameStop in his hometown for the Midnight Madness release of Super Smash Bros. Brawl and took part in the in-store tournament that apparently most locations were holding: he won at his store. Details for the tournament can be found here. Apparently he now moves on to the District Finals next weekend in Manchester, CT - should he somehow win there, he would move on to the Regional Finals where I’m guessing the location would be New Hyde Park, NY. The true Finals are in San Jose, CA. Now, I know the guy is a good player - and I don’t know if he could make it as far as the true finals - but I think it would be kind of neat to take a spur of the moment trip to CA with a buddy to go watch him play in a tournament for this. ;)  Definitely best of luck to him though.

While he was over, we definitely got some game time in of it and it definitely aims to please. In some ways it felt like it was “more of the same” for the franchise, but I don’t think any fans of the franchise would think of that as a bad thing. Some of the new levels are definitely interesting, with the Mario Kart level bringing karts from different directions (and actually letting you place a well-timed hit to send a kart off the track and at an opponent) and the WarioWare level forcing you to take part in minigames as you fight. Some of the new items are very neat as well, such as the 3-part rocket of death you can only use if you happen to pick up all three pieces during a fight, or the “break me” ball that will allow you to execute a Final Smash move with a simple press of the B button (which, by the way, some of the Final Smash moves are simply devastating: Ike’s Final Smash will likely send you if you have any damage taken before he gets to you).

I liked it, I really did; but I’m still on the fence about whether or not I will be going out to pick up my own copy. It’s a great party game but I only get to hang out in person with people who would be willing to play it once in a blue moon, and the draw of online play is tempting but I know I won’t be able to consistently put together online games with those people either - which means dealing with the powergamers out there who can beat me blindfolded and/or the 12-year olds who would rather turn their Wii off and disconnect from the match rather than face a true loss. We’ll see. I still have Metroid Prime 3 to play through and beat anyway since the DS has been keeping me really busy lately, maybe I’ll get back into that for now and bide my time until Kart comes out.

Not to be confused with any of the other nouveau-chic medical conditions on the market today (*cough*), DS Leg Syndrome (or DSLS) is a condition that I am sure many of my gaming brethren have fallen victim to. There you are, minding your own business while trying to do your business. The DS has made the trip into the bathroom with you because… well, why not? You’re chugging along playing the latest game you can’t get enough of, and that’s when you suddenly realize “Hey, wait a minute. I’ve been done trying to go to the bathroom for 45 freaking minutes. Why am I still in here?” Close the lid of the DS, take your elbows off your knees and owwwwwwww.

Congratulations my friend, you’ve just succumbed to another episode of DSLS; the symptom of spending such an extraordinary amount of time pressing your elbows into your thighs that you have successfully reduced your circulation to practically nothing. As the blood begins to flow through your legs again, your legs slowly feel numb and as if they are not your own. How do you cope? Do you ride it out, knowing that you will only be able to walk again once enduring the excruciating pain of your nerve receptors coming back online? Do you hit yourself in the thigh, sending shockwaves of feeling rippling down your leg as you force the blood to move swifter through your veins? God only knows that if you stood up right now you would do only one of two things - immediately fall over as you realize that you have no control of your legs, nor can they hold you upright by themselves at this moment in time; or be forced to support yourself on the sink, trying not to put too much weight on either leg and wishing dearly that feeling would just come back so that you could continue your life as normal.

Damn you, Professor Layton. Damn you Advance Wars, Picross, Mario & Luigi, Tetris, Puzzle Quest, damn all of you games past present and future that inflict this wretched condition upon me.

credit to ShortAttentionGamer (RIP) for the image